"I wonder if they Study Philosophy....I wonder"

First of all can I just say I never knew how fulfilled you could feel, just how simply wonderful friends saying that they love you and miss you and wish you a happy birthday can feel--no bday card with money can do this. Nothing. My best friends yelling CHACHHH on texts or on voicemails to me makes me know that at age twenty I have some of the best people in my life right now that I will ever have.

So as some of you may have known, today is my birthday,with 15 mins left to soak it all in. I had planned for a while to celebrate it as ostentatious as I did. Well just kidding, I opted for a whale watch out of Gloucester with two very great friends, one who I have known for eight years, and another I met last fall. Yes only I would choose to go on a whalewatch for my birthday, and only I would know everything the naturalist was about to say, but thats okay, I'm glad I know that whales don't breach for any particular reason. I also after today am not giving up on opening a coffee shop named, "The Breaching Whale". Brought to my attention today was the realization of just how lucky I am to have these wondeful people in my life. I saw my family for a total of five minutes today, but I guess that is part of growing up, but for the record I do love them. Last night I was a bit weary of the day to follow. As I was driving home from Price Chopper at 12 a.m. tears started rolling down my eyes, I'm not quite sure why. All the things I had wanted to accomplish by 20, the ways I had viewed myself years back as a 20-year-old. I'm not as posh as I thought I'd be. I'm a guitar playing hippie who drinks more coffee than eats salads, and someone who says anyhow more than websters dictionary allows for. But anyhow thats not the point. Despite all of these previous notions I had of the Chelsea Whitton to come, today I was able to sit on the whale watch and just let it out, just sit there in complete isolation on the ocean with these gorgeous creatures, and just live simply and in the moment. Its the simple things in life, such as going out 30 miles off shore that allow me to think clearly.
The whalewatch was quite amazing. The baby calfs are young and naiive so they tend to stay close to the boat--curious as to what is on it, so they spy hop( look up and you can see there eyes looking at you) or just roll around near the boat. One got so close I'm pretty sure we accidentally bumped it...oops. But the weather was amazing, and the beauty of these animals is just incredible, seeing a 100 ton animal completely lift itself into mid air, just because it feels like it, is pretty impressive. I thoguht to myself, something like, "God you did a good job with these guys." I don't want to get all religious on you all.

I also had some real intellectual conversations with Mary today...just kidding. Today on the boat traveling to the reservation, I said, "I just for one day want to be a humpback whale. They don't have to worry about college or money, or maybe they do, maybe they study philosophy. I really don't know."
Mary replies in a very inquisitive voice, "Ya, I wonder."...laughter breaks out.

Naturalist says,
"Look at anchor, you can see her shoulder blades. Its a skinny whale."
I say,
"Isn't that an oxymoron?"

I was also thinking today, I always have some sort of dilemma on birthdays, I know its my own fault, I mean I could make them perfectly happy if I wanted to. Flashback--I'll never forget my... I think it was 11th birthday. I so badly wanted this hand-made beautiful quilt for my new room. I was very much into like re-decorating at this point...some of you may remember the epic "Trading Spaces" phase. By the end of July that year I was surely out of my horse obsession, I still liked to ride, but I was over the whole horse lover image haha (yes I'm laughing at myself too). What do you know, that summer, on my birthday camping in Jamacia, Vermont we were celebrating on an over cast day, and out pops my mother from the camping trailer with a hard tissue paper covered wooden plaque sort of thing. I unwrapped it to only throw it on the table and go crying to the woods seconds later. It was a horse head plaque, ornate, but weird. It must still be in the attic somewhere, because we couldn't return the shiteous carpentry. Oh birthdays, always dramatic, but at least I can look back and laugh. But today was different, monumental,and part of this whole life transition I am currently going through. Rockport, MA is a gem, and I'm so happy today was just another reminder of how good life can be. So I guess I can say happy 20th to me :)
Love,
Chach